EQUIPMENT AND RESOURCES: When we embark upon an important journey, we are usually
able to prepare ourselves with the knowledge we need for a successful, enjoyable and
worthwhile experience. Depending on the extent of the travel plans, we gather a map, travel
documents, make reservations in advance so preparations can be made for our arrivals.
We learn languages, we choose our vehicle or mode of transport; we purchase fuel or tickets;
we know where we’re going and how long it will take and when we’re going home.
HISTORICALLY NO HUMAN MAP: Yet, on the journey of life, we often hear our friends’ and
neighbors’ frustration, complaint and regret that we aren’t given a manual nor a guide for life…
for parenting, for adolescence, for marriage and relationships nor for our mission. As the human
development work has progressed over the last 20 years, we have studied, discovered, designed
and refined many resources which were unavailable to previous generations.
TODAY
WE KNOW THE WAY: The ReWriting Your Future handbook coalesces as many
of these current guides as is practical for verbal and written format.
STAGES
OF LIFE: Each chronological stage of life calls forth two universal
abilities that seem to be in opposition and that press for resolution
such as The Nurturer and The Warrior. It is never too late to learn
these elements of human nature. Many people today do not resolve their
childhood issues, develop emotional intelligence or intimate
relationships until well into adulthood, or even into old age.
SELF-KNOWLEDGE:
Recognizing what issues are incomplete, by itself, can have a powerful
effect on our lives, allowing us to open up to the potential energy
that can complete that process for us. It can also help us see what
kind of help we might need.
CHOOSING OUR STRENGTHS: The
experience of giving life to each of your parts or roles often brings
great relief and empowerment. Most of us struggle in some fashion to do
the right thing and often feel that we must accept the consequences of
bad choices, self-doubt, fears, confusion or frustrations. But
understanding our personal roles can feel empowering. We can
avoid defining or limiting ourselves to old habits by learning which
behavior works successfully or against us in different circumstances.
FOR
EXAMPLE…FINDING A MATE: For example, if our Child is still
carrying a wound about abandonment, the Child will be defensive against
a possible mate or be needy and urgently clingy. If our Lover tries to
be romantic with a new date, the Child will throw a tantrum, get bratty
or it might also get controlling and whiney and scare off any
possibility for further dates. The Child will refuse to listen to the
Lover but, if you notice what’s happening inside yourself, one of the
things you can do is internally comfort the Child…perhaps even become
the Parent and assure the inner Child that it can relax and not worry
allowing us to behave appropriately or with discernment.
ASSUMPTIONS:
From birth, each of us experiences the process of becoming human. And,
through the process, we make assumptions about who we are and what it
is to be human.
BRAIN DEVELOPMENT: We learn about our bodies,
our environment, our abilities and about other people while the brain
grows through the developmental stages of maturation and learns how to
function for successful living physically, emotionally, intelligently
and relationally.
YOUR HISTORY: How we perceive ourselves,
others and the world is largely dependent on what we experience from
our environment…what happens in our home and how our society or tribe
behaves and interprets life.
POWERFUL MEMORIES: In the
following exercise, describe the most powerful memories from your past.
The object is to gain insight on your formative experiences and what
they taught you that formed certain beliefs whether true or confusing.
We all learn useful information from both fortunate experiences and
troubling expriences.
CONTENTS OF THE DEEP SELF-KNOWLEDGE STUDY GUIDE
I.A. Identity and Influences from the World
1. The Power of Naming - How is My Style Unique?Personality Patterns – Who Am I?
Personal Roles – The Dimensions of My Identity
My Childhood Life Script – What was my first story/role model?
Personality Type – Your Enneagram
Six Universal Abilities – Integrating the Shadow into the Gift
Naming the Hats You Wear – The Characters or Costumes
Moving Above My Myths
2. Life Stories – Our Generation, Journey and Stages
Patterns, Habits and Parables for Life – Where Did I Come From?
Three Kinds of Consciousness
Seven Levels of Archetypes
The Meaning of Life
Personal Roles
Our Road Map – The Hero’s Journey
Integrating the Six Pairs of the Journey Stages
The Hero’s Journey -- Our Stages of Life
Finding a New Story
Social or Ritual Archetypes
I.B. Lessons from the Past1. Looking Back: My Life’s Events and Schooling
Your Journey – My Timeline
Your Major Life Events – What Were My Lessons?
Synthesis of Major Life Events – My Life’s Schooling
Your Family Story - What Were My Roles?
Your Original Story – The Genogram
Ericsson’s Psychological Developmental Stages
The Basic Qualities of the Four Family-of-Origin Roles
Effects of Childhood Interactions
Replacing My Past to Create My Future Happiness
Forgiving the Past
2. Building Self-Esteem: Individuation and Re-Parenting
Integrating Gender Differences In Society
Boundaries of Respect– Balancing Privacy and Closeness
Re-Parenting – Empowerment Today
Mind and Thought
Heart and Emotions
Body and Fitness
Instinct and Sexuality
Spirituality and Character
The Moment of Commitment
Heather Carlile, a certified LPC and LMFT Supervisor, whose private
practice is in Richardson, TX, specializes in depth psychology and marriage
counseling. Her unique transpersonal philosophy, which she uses to relieve
anxiety, depression, guilt, anger and grief, integrates archetypes and the Enneagram.
She created and co-facilitates Designer
Marriage with her husband, Dr.
Jack Waldenmaier in classes and on the radio.
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